Perception or Reality?

I've recently took to pondering about how truly happy people are and whether the change in economic climate has had a massive impact on how we view ourselves and others.

I know I am happy, despite facing considerable personal challenges in my past and present life. I also know when others are not because they question why I am. I honestly don't find myself looking at the way my friends and family live and questioning why. Those that do are clearly looking for some kind of reassurance and reason for their own life choices.

To give you an example;

Last year, I finally managed to achieve what I thought was THE impossible task - having a baby. It only took 10 years and a couple of very late miscarriages to get there. I was living abroad at the time of giving birth to Oscar and had set my mind to experiencing a different way of life and culture for at least 3 years. However it was not to be and under very difficult circumstances we moved back to the UK with a 3 week old baby. I didn't know it at the time but I was also spiralling towards a serious dose of PND. Hubby started to look for work, but together with a very tearful and constantly dribbly nosed wife draining his resources and a very difficult economic climate, it proved to be an impossible task. I also found out I had skin cancer. Oh and Oscar was almost treated for TB (except it wasn't in the end - THANK GOD).

It soon became apparent that our life as we knew it pre-move abroad was not going to exist in the new world and so we decided to take a different approach. That's when Derbymums was born as a concept and since then we have channelled all of our business skills and experience in to the project.

As a consequence however, we have had to make massive financial sacrifices and there is no doubt that our new way of living has been at times tough - however the benefits as I realised the other day hugely outweigh the disadvantages. These are mainly;

Our son has us both around and so has the benefit of twice the love care and attention. I appreciate that we are very lucky to be able to provide this, hence why it is at the top of my list

Hubby and I have each other and we get on well. We are a business partnership and best friends. We have our disagreements but I wouldn't be without him. We can bounce business ideas around all day and we don't have to wait for a rushed time slot over a hurried evening meal before our heads hit the pillow with exhaustion

We can go for walks in the day with Oscar and just sit and take in nature and the world around us. When I worked in the "corporate world", I barely had time to think for myself let alone focus on what was going on around me

I don't have to worry about any back stabbing, conniving, up to no good, vindictive bosses who want nothing more than to make you look bad whilst making themselves look great. I have been in this situation more times than I care to remember, mostly since it became acceptable in todays' society to treat people like sh*t and not with common decency

So, when well meaning friends and family imply that we are in a sorry situation and must be terribly down about what we have lost and how we now live, I find myself having to put them right. And I would question, are you sure that living in a corporate world, battling to find time to nuture those closest to you, trying to prove yourself all the time when in reality you could just do without it, taking time to take a deep breath and reflect on where you are heading in life and just generally appreciating your life for what it is, is making you really happy?

Everyone has a different way of looking at things. I just know I am happy being me, doing what I'm doing and trying to make a difference by launching a business that will work with local people, businesses and charities. And because I am happy being me, I am perfectly happy for everyone else.

Isn't that the way it should be?